Tell us a little about yourselves
We are a recently engaged, adventurous and madly in love (lesbian) couple from Balmoral, Brisbane. I (Kat) am a Cosmetic Tattoo Artist and Kirsten owns her own Brisbane based Cabinet Making business. We love to travel and live for finding new places to explore and experience.
How did you meet, and fall in love?
We met each other 5 years ago one night on a chance encounter at our local gay bar ‘The Beat Megaclub’. Traditionally not how long loving relationships start from but that night something in the universe brought us together.
I (Kat) was instantly attracted to Kirsten and I knew that I had to get to know her. With a little bit of courage we exchanged conversation and phone numbers, (let’s be real honest here) we followed each other on social media and began creeping each other’s Instagrams the next day.
After countless nights out driving around our city to find a beautiful lookout somewhere, getting to know each other while staring at city lights and looking at stars, we didn’t realise it at the time but our relationship was growing. After 3 months of seeing each other every day, losing sleep because our conversations continued into the early hours of the morning and inexplicably falling in love with every part of each other, we were official. Our meals became shared, our “I’s” became “we” and Kirsten started filling my car up at the petrol station.
Like all modern love stories, we finally found our Sunday morning coffee date, the Player 2 for Xbox, our car karaoke equal, someone to hold while we cried during the Twilight Saga series, the person to finish off your great stories and that person to laugh with at your old jokes. For modern lesbians couples, it’s the bonus bobby pins in the bathroom, really good hair products in the shower, extra makeup we didn’t know we needed and that reassuring “You’re beautiful” when we feel at our worst. We found the best in the each other and accepted the worst. We loved each other both wholly and equally. We fell in love.
Who proposed and how?
From the moment I (Kirsten) met Kat I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with her. After four years of love, travel and adventure I knew her birthday trip to the United States of America would be the perfect time and place to make it happen. I had planned her ring and proposal for a year and a half, it was time.
In fall on September the 14th 2017, inside the New York State Library as Kat was looking out of a large arched window in the stairwell, I took her hand. For some reason, I was so nervous and filled with emotion. With tears in my eyes, I just looked at her, holding the ring box in my left hand – she started crying and held me. I whispered in her ear “Will you be my forever?” And she said, “Yes, always”. We both stood there holding each other crying as tourists bustled past and the security guards watching, smiling with tears in their eyes also. It was the best moment of my life.
Kat asked if her mum knew or her sister knew. I told her I had something to show her so I took her outside and we sat on the steps out the front of the library and showed her a video. In the movie, I had asked each of her family members and close friends for Kat’s hand in marriage and their approval. They each made a short video of their well wishes and love. I wrote a letter of love, promise and for permission to Kats late father and sent it to the universe in hope for a sign that he would approve of our marriage. After 40 minutes of (happy) tears, we were beaming with happiness. We were finally engaged.
How did you find the engagement ring?
After being tagged in quite a few images of rings on Instagram I kept my eye out for the perfect ring for Kat. A local jeweller had the most beautiful rectangular cushion cut diamond (with a halo) and finer diamonds on the shoulder, it was perfect. I wanted to make sure that it was exactly what she wanted so after a year and a half of planning and hard work I was excited to finally propose in New York.
What does marriage mean to you?
We are excited to be finally recognised by the government as two people in love and that we will be official. The ‘little piece of paper’ that generations before us have fought so hard for will be finally recognised.
We are finally equal, so all of the planning, saving and hard work is worth it. To us marriage means a lifetime commitment of choosing each other every day, growing in love, unconditional trust and support and being the best people we can be for each other.
Marriage is our way of screaming from the rooftops that we are in love and we want to share it with the world.
How do you think marriage will change your relationship?
We believe that the commitment of marriage won’t change our relationship per say. If anything it will make us equal and recognised as any other married couple. Two people who chose each other to share their love, family and trust with, above anyone or anything else.
How did you know your partner was the one?
I (Kat) knew that Kirsten was the one when she made me laugh and smile when I was upset or feeling low. She has most sincere perspective on life and I knew my happiness was her happiness. We share the same core values and morals in life and even though we are two totally polar opposite people, somehow our stars aligned and it created magic.
(Kirsten) Kat understood the most complex parts of me without explanation, she taught me that you could be loved even if you weren’t whole. We could speak to each other until the early hours of the morning or spend nights under the stars in silence, it was just effortless, I knew it felt right.
How is the wedding planning going?
The whole process has been really fun. We are set to be wed on the anniversary of our engagement this year in the hinterland of Byron Bay.
Being two women it can be hard to agree on some decisions as we have different tastes, but that stuff is all trivial (happy wife, happy life).
We are both creative people and love spending time finding new and different ways to do things and include for our big day. A lot of vendors and companies have been really supportive and accepting of our marriage which, to be honest, we were a little hesitant about, but now we are equal in the eyes of the law, we aren’t holding back!
What do you most look forward to about your wedding?
Kirsten: Seeing my beautiful bride walking down the aisle.
Kat: Seeing my gorgeous wife to be at the end of the aisle and being pronounced “Wife and Wife!”
What’s the best relationship advice you’ve ever been given?
To be patient, to forgive without ego and to choose each other every day. To love unconditionally and promise each other a lifetime love and adventures.
What’s your relationship advice for couples planning their big day?
Compromise. Don’t let it consume you. Enjoy the process and laugh about the trivial things. Someone once said “No one will remember the little things they’ll just remember how good the food was and how much fun they had” so don’t stress about the things you can’t control and surround yourself with people who support your relationship.
Anything else you’d like to share?
Thank you so much Honeywed for sharing our love and supporting Gay Marriage xx